Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Exams for my students..

Today board exams started. I was on an invigilation duty for class six students in my school. Before entering the hall, i had sternly warned them not to get involved in any foul practices and had frisked them for the sake of formality. At 9 am, they nervously started writing their answers despite the cold weather.Curiosity got over the better half of me as usual and went through their english paper.
As i flipped over the pages, i saw an essay on Mountain Goat/Goral, taken from Kuzoo Society(special edition, it read). The author(no name), had beautifully written it and after few paragraphs i became aware that the essay was an attempt to describe his favorite animal. I thought of my own favorite animal. The yak? Nope, it makes me too nomadic to patronise yaks. Cattles, huh? Hmm..i like thei...r meat but not them! The dog? Grrr..i never had any good diplomacy with dogs. Despicably dirty they are. The cat? Aww..not cats even. The closest favour i can generously render to cats is call their names-Tengye Zandrey!
How about pig? The pig?? Gotcha! WOw..i like them. I bet it. With due respect to pigs, most of my survival habits resemble with them. Look at them, silky and obese. This is indicative of their owner's bountiful harvest. On a closer look, their eyes resemble much like ours, i mean mine, glowing with steely determination and suspect! Their ears, a pair of sensitive organ, dangles so restlessly and their pulpy snout matches perfectly with the length of their ears. And the pork. Now you are salivating, right? No Bhutanese dish could be complete with out pork, i bet. And mind you, a pig's orgasm lasts just 30 seconds, almost similar to mine. Ha ha ha.
Well, i have another striking favorite- my colour. Blue it is. Not that i watch blue films. Lol. But yes, without doubt, i really fall for blue colours. And if you are more into chemistry, you would get more fascinated by this colour. Sky-blu precipitate, azure blue complexes, deep blue needle like crystals, faint blue tinge, neon blue, royal blue..blah blah. Perhaps, my closet is influenced due to these reasons that most of my jackets/pants/shirts are blue in colour. Blue is indicative of my nature self: dreamy and romantic(? eh). And what is more,(but dont tell others!!) i have got blue balls :) :) :)

(As usual, i have tried to mix bizzare humour. Hope my readers will not accuse me for dirty humour. Please do bear with me..good day teachers.)

God in Me?!

I do not go to the Lhakhangs generally but i believe in religion. I do not pray but i do believe i represent the best of any Buddha nature. You see, that is the audacity in me! The last time i partook religious adventure was some two years ago when i and bunch of my friends went to Bay-langdra. I nearly left my foot impression on a rock that i rested there....lol.
I know it is sensitive issue for ...me and my readers to write on religion in a place where God is everywhere. However, i do not mean in any way to mock at or belittle my own supreme beliefs in religion. My religion and my god is in everything that i do and more so, especially when i go to my quarter during late nights-i get so closely bonded with my supernatural god. Bumthang, as most of you are aware, is one of the global hot spots of unholy creatures whom we call Ghosts. Well, i never met one as of now, thanks to my good luck, i guess. Even if i accidently met so, the least i can do is to request 'them' for a round of Taekwondo, a feat that i can boast of as my only means of self-defense! Nevertheless, i am quite aware this time around, "they" must be hibernating to do away with the extreme cold in Bumthang.....
(...to be continued...)

Saturday, November 26, 2011

I am back again to my laptop. It was almost two weeks since i last typed a word in here and that was good bodily and mentally too. For a change, i was vacationing in Gelephu as i mentioned earlier. Wow! That is rather flamboyant, right? For a teacher, it looks like an yearly outing. Opportunities are hard to come by but there is no surprise in it.
I tell you, Gelephu is just warm these days. For an alpine dwellers like i and my two other friends who were there for the same reason, it was a treat to walk around the streets of Gelephu town in T-shirts! In Bumthang, you wont dare to bare your fingers. Here we wrap all our skin in best possible wools that are available. If you are seeking for an authentic look at the girls for the curves/bumps/delicate skins/thighs or whatever sexy in them, Bumthang is not a right time at this hour. They got everything in them safely tucked in double layers of jackets! Nothing to see..hehe. Go down south, you are there for wonders.  But,I believe,as an elderly citizen, it is sinful to stare at girls who are almost half my age, dressed as skimpily as possible and swaying their body as rhythmic as waves. Honestly. Nevertheless yes, i consider myself only genuine human species since i exhibit natural temptations to anything that is usual. Do you blame me still?..lol
I saw a petite girl in a bar that we went into to douse our off hours in the town. Dressed in a light jeans and a shirt and probably a sport-bra(!), she was cut out for all that is superlatively beautiful. My eyes would pop out whenever she knelt down to pick something up but i kept reminding myself of the sensible teaching of Lord Buddha--See No Evil! I looked at my friends to see if they saw my nasty look and no way! They got their docile pairs of eyes browsing for similar gold. "There is nothing wai", i shrug them off their fantasy. We laughed out looking at and accusing each other.
Biologically, i hail from Gelephu, not from the town but from Norbuling, an hour walk from that infamous Maukhola. So most of the off hours i was busy ferrying to my old parents and the Gelephu H School. The fury of Maukhola hasnt leaned and the old boat that ferried people is still working,almost precariously. Often, i had to request the boat men to ferry me across the river since i went that way at odd hours, most of the time. I regretted at not having taken my camera but i did force my unwilling friends to experience the boat-trip. And what is more, to cheer them up, i drove them around to India! Now two of them can boast of atleast landing their feet little short of Jagar-Phagpai-Yul. DaadGari isnt that far, try your luck too! He he he.
Gosh, it is 8 and almost time to declare results for the students...byebye. Will come back with more substance next time..Good weekend,teachers!

Friday, November 11, 2011

Ter Chham In Bumthang

The famed Naked Dance of Jambay Lhakhang Tshechu, typically called as
"Ter Chham" by the Bumthaps started two days ago. My friends and i started as soon as the dusk fell since we didnt want to miss the Mey-wang. Ironically, i believe strongly in Mey-wangs and have always tried to make my presence in most of the mey-wangs in Bumthang. Despite, the least i can do is purge my bodily sins by receivin...g Mey-wangs as frequently as possible. Truth be told, i never had opportunity to witness the Naked dance during my decade old reign in Bumthang! I balme it to the odd timing(Ter cham starts not earlier than 12 midnight!) and extremely cold temperature. Personally, i thought if it wasnt this year that i see it, then it is never going to happen in my life. So, I equipped myself with a enough warm clothes to brave the cold. Just as you might like to read what i wore: My made-in-Dhaka trouser topped with my Nike trackpant. On it, i wore my nearly faded Wrangler-jeanpant so that i dont let my silverbones go icy cold! On my pectoral girdle, i had two shirts with my old sweat-shirt and over it, my red North-face jacket. That aint enough: i had my muffler(i borrowed it from my son..hehe) around my neck, a pair of gloves to take care of my bony fingers and a good woolen pull-overs to warm my head! As i walked with my friends, i could see my shadow being cast on the ground and seriously i never thought i was fat enough. I thought the shadow remarkably looked like an astronuat walking on the moon!
So we waited for the time to pass by. With such a dress up over my body, i have discarded any thoughts of trying to wink at girls. We hopped into bars and had our share of drinks to boost our warmth and also our morale. After much waiting, it was
announced that the cham would be shortly started. I had to leave behind my half filled glass of beer get myself seated at about 7th row from the front. There it came! Some 18-19 dancers, all at their au naturel except for their face! Interestingly, there were four or five small children in the group too. They had nothing much to boast! But the excited audiences did shout,"Lichi juice" at them, hinting at their peaceful sizes.:). I was straining all the muscles placed around my eyes trying to keep a good focus on what i was watching so that i wont regret later. Few rows in front were, groups of Sharchop Aums and girls intensely involved like me. One of an elderly woman whispered as loud to her friends,"Tshe bang ga ta la na , halam thur!". They burried their faces into their palms and burst into peels of laughter. Yeah not bad, i thought to myself! Ha ha.
By the time i reached back home, it was 3.45 am in the morning. There was no regret but a sense of satisfaction. Naked dance it is...

Good weekends, friends.

Sunday, November 6, 2011

Cold holidays!

· · · 5 hours ago

I am slothfully at half the activity that i framed for myself to overcome these cold holidays here. Were it not for the incessant visitors who barged during my intense work hours, i could have finished all that i had planned to achieve. At one time, just as i was trying to type my questions for class v, an aquaintance dropped by to see how i was doing during the breaks. I let him know that i didnt... have anything really interesting to do than just type questions for the students but i wanted him to include me if he thought of any outdoor adventure. He hadnt thought of it either. I said i have two pair of boxing gloves hung in my bedroom and kidded him that i use those old gloves to entertain my guests! He took it seriously! Few minutes laters, he left me alone to feel rather guilty! Ha ha.
Choden complained of my indolence. She ridiculed that i was the laziest of all the species available. "The last time i heard of same accusation was a decade back", i told her as a matter of factly."You know what happened to that old class mate of mine who called me lazy pig?", i blurted out at her. She didnt want to know it. "He had to scurry to the nearby BHU to nurse his bleeding nose!! ", i delcared filmsily. She barged into kitchen to cook. Seriously, i thought i should catch up with some neighbours who are active diurnals. I can see mr.X chopping firewoods or mr.Y washing his car or that old mr.Zaffar taking a walk to maintain his blood-glucose level! I look at my own state. Why me?, I had chooped my firewoods long time back and that would last us two winters without doubt! My car, it is as glittery as the original kohinoor diamond! My health? Hmm..this is the last worry that would occupy me as a potentail threat. Every cell in me is as healthy as natural! Despite, i include lot of leafy vegetables and protien to sustain my health..so basically no worries for me:). Well, i tell you if you go on worrying about things that are half likely to happen even in your dreams, you are in for all the illness that are available in the world. Sometimes i wonder i have incorrigible ulcer but i aint easy to be bugged down by a mere problem of indigestion! Migraine? Oh yes, i get throbbing pains at one side of head regularly. Schizophrenia? Hmm.. may be, but i do get difficult times when i cant distinguish what is real and not real. How about Down's Syndrome? Gee, i was always slow in anything to learn. It could be due to this chromosomal abberation! Arthritis? Well, my bones have always been my achilles' heel. Delicate as a china shop, i cant risk using tension to my bones. I love them much! Scabies?! Darn! Honestly, i had survived numerous bouts of scabies but each time i recovered from it, my skin glowed with doubled luminiosity! Well well well..thou must be suffering from all the ailments listed in Clinical texts! lol. Only thing is not to worry and let life come by or go by till you breathe your last...adios adios!!

That is all i can write this morning,,,good sunday dear teachers!
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Saturday, November 5, 2011

Long week end...from Teacher's forum

· · · Yesterday at 8:07am

We inagurated one of the most cherished maneuveres of our school yesterday:consecration of Jambayyang Lhakhang. The venerable Tang Rinpoche and his Trulku son did all the ceremony befitting of our year-long struggle. Towards the afternoon, there was Jambayyang Wang for the students and people who religiously gathered in our school. Infact, just as lazy as i am, i have lost the track of day and da...te but it is holiday for us. Series of holidays: Jakar Tshechu,Trakar Tshechu,11 NOvember,Jambay Lhakhang Mewang. So i have timed my activities in such a way that i get enough measures of work and fun.
I would have to prepare question paper for class V,science. I have hinted them in no uncertain terms that questions would be "very tough" to which most of them shrieked repraochfully.
Number 2: Take bath!!:). I fail in this department too. Not that i like being dirty. I am clean-freak! But because it is cold, i often let go my bath routine with excuses. Before that, i gotta fix my window in the bathroom. It has been half broken since the beginning of the year and honestly i have never given a thought to fix it till an elderly neighbour hinted that he could see half of my family's "au naturel" through it! Sensing potential threat, i temporarily used an old shirt to shut down further views that i thought was not censored!
At number 3: Washing. I have always been a lazy family man. I am going to break that record straight this time. I have suggested Choden to pile up all the heavy clothings so that i can handle it and leave her free for the timebeing. I even recommended her for a healthy vacation from kitchen but she wont still trust my cookery skills.
At number 4, comes the arrangement for the Tshechu. I would have to first go the bank and zero my balance there before trying to embark on a Tshechu and that would leave me in hazardous situation since i have another duty to reach Gelephu HSS for the practical examinations. So as of now, i might have to convince my kids about the nuisances of Tshechu but i am aware they wont listen to it:))
Oh hold on, i forgot the list...i tell you i have enough work to do than enjoy during this break...but i would often update my fellow friends if only you will...:)

good day teachers..!
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